How to Tame your Ego
The ego gets a bad reputation in the real world.
And to be honest, you can’t blame people.
Look left.
Now, look right.
Do you see that?
I see a bunch of people who have their ego’s controlling them.
They have untamed egos and they are not even AWARE of it.
‘Whoa whoa Armani, back up a little. What exactly is an ego?’
Ah, good question my friend.
Let us go through the basics of the ego & teach you how to wield it to give you an advantage.
If you apply the tips in this article, you will realize that an ego is a TOOL.
And you were the master all along.
Let us begin.
What is the Ego?
In plain terms:
The ego is your identity or sense of self.
Every experience that you have had growing up, people that you have encountered & traumas that you overcame shaped your ego.
The ego rests between the conscious and subconscious mind.
It serves as a bridge.
All the events that you have been through have been stored in the database of your subconscious mind.
And your conscious mind gets data from that database, forms it with perception & that creates your self-image.
The ego gives every human their sense of uniqueness.
And an ego is something that can either aid you in your level up journey or make it a living hell.
What is an Untamed Ego?
You ever met that person who only saw life through their eyes?
A brutal narcissist with little or no empathy.
A person who magically made every conversation about themself?
Yes, that person has an untamed ego.
But you can even take it a level further.
People with untamed egos are not always loud and brash.
Many of them can actually be timid!
Believe it or not, social anxiety is a form of having an untamed ego.
‘Huh???’
Yes!
Think about it.
Why is someone socially anxious?
It’s because they are self-conscious in social situations.
Why are they self-conscious?
It’s because they feel like all their moves are being watched.
‘Why do they think all their moves are being watched?’
Because they feel special.
When you get to the root cause of the issue, it seems rather silly that everyone will be watching one person.
Can you fly?
‘No.’
Then other people are not watching your every move.
But guess what?
Your ego paints an illusion that people are. Also known as the Spotlight Effect.
The ego is your self-image & an untamed ego is magnifying that self-image.
You feel like your sense of importance is manifesting into other people’s lives.
Therefore, an untamed ego can produce a very brash personality or a very meek one.
Should You Kill the Ego?
I often hear people say ‘I am meditating so I can kill my ego!’
What a foolish statement.
You can’t kill the ego.
It is your sense of self!
If you try killing it & have no sense of self, then you are simply replacing it with a renewed ego.
Your perception of yourself will be a nobody.
Which is why there can never be a void.
There is always something that fills that void of self-image.
But killing the ego is a poor strategy as well.
An ego gives your life a sense of purpose.
You know what happens when you minimize it?
‘What?’
You get a nice guy.
A nice guy is a people pleaser who does not value themself.
Result? They become a doormat in the process.
You don’t want that!
‘So what is the solution?’
You tame your ego.
How to Tame Your Ego
A tamed ego is a beautiful thing.
It makes your life so much easier & more fulfilling.
You stop personalizing negatives, stop forcing your beliefs onto others & maintain a clear vision along the way.
A tamed ego helps you in your level up the journey.
It allows you to have a poised persona that is not easily rattled.
You mature along the way.
‘Whoa man! This seems too good to be true!’
It sort of is.
‘Why?’
Because a tamed ego often comes thru pain.
Look at people who are very mature for their age or just mature in general.
They didn’t just get like that.
They were crafted into that from hardships & overcoming those hardships.
Therefore, taming your ego is not a finite state.
It is a lifelong journey.
You will continue to tame it more and more with each chapter of life that you tackle.
Each conflict that you overcome with poise will allow you to gain perspective.
Each perspective gained allows you to maintain your sense of self AND comprehend your place in the universe.
You have to understand, that everyone is fighting a battle.
Everyone is the main character in their own life.
When you digest this, you can work on your mission & respect other people for where they are in their lives.
I want to give you some tips on taming your ego quicker than the average bubba.
Because understand this:
You don’t mature with the age.
You mature with the pain, introspection & re calibration.
1. Meditate
Meditation has proven scientific health benefits. It allows you to maintain a more responsive behavior versus reactive.
Reactive is when you are being impulsive to the whims of your emotions.
Responsive is when you are understanding those emotions to make a rational decision.
Meditation will help you understand your sense of self & tame your ego in the process.
Every day, find a quiet spot & count your natural breaths.
When you find your mind losing focus, gently make yourself aware & focus back on your breath.
Start off with 1 minute & work your way up.
That’s it.
2 . Build a Grand Life Purpose
Your life purpose should not be to get a bonus on your paycheck.
Think BIGGER.
Designing a grand life purpose is something that is very counter-intuitive.
You’re designing it in a way where it cannot be obtained, but it gives you direction.
‘Huh??”
Say your life purpose is to become the most confident person on the planet.
By becoming your most confident self, you are going to help other people become their most confident selves.
Well, that is very grand!
How do you go about achieving something like that?
You do it by overcoming hardships, providing value & being consistent in your chosen craft.
These 3 tasks are not something that you just achieve one day so you can mail it in.
Rather, these 3 tasks are stuff that you can do for the rest of your life!
You are building your value from within.
You are providing value to the external world.
A combination of mastering your internal & external world melts the untamed ego & tames it in the process.
And more importantly, you continue to grow in the journey.
3. Welcome hardships
If you were able to follow step 2 correctly, then you will notice a lot of hardships being thrown your way.
If you don’t have any hardships being thrown your way, then you didn’t paint a big enough vision!
But a grand vision will continue to level you up.
It will continue to present new problems.
You will feel self-doubt, will be backstabbed & feel emotional pain etc.
But that’s good!
Remember, pain teaches you how to tame your ego.
Pain gives you perspective.
Pain gives you courage!
And most importantly, pain lights your FIRE.
You need to welcome hardships.
While most people are sitting on their ass watching Netflix all day, you are stretching past the comfort zone.
As you stretch past the comfort zone, your ego will recalibrate.
It will maintain its sense of self, but will tame so it is aiding you in your journey vs. taking you off the path.
That’s how the game was meant to be played.
Use your Ego as a Weapon
A tamed ego hacks your maturity.
You stop personalizing attacks, stop behaving impulsively, and are much more calculative with your moves.
It allows you to clarify your life.
You now provide with the tamed ego rather than take all the time with the untamed ego.
Your nerves will melt in the process & you will feel much more powerful along the way.
Learning how to tame your ego is by no means an easy journey.
Which is why only a rare few are able to do it.
But when you do enter the club, you feel as though you have an advantage that money can’t by.
You have clarity.
And that clarity helps you carve your path as you work towards your grand vision.
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– ArmaniTalks 🎙️🔥
